Self-Hatred

I have a handful of female friends that I would call a "friend". You have people in life for different reasons: Support, business and security. Support are the people that will have your back no matter what. They will pick up the phone no matter what time it is and listen to you vent and understand your venting. They are real deal supporter during the good and bad and not somebody who just comes around when things are good. Business are the people that someone might refer to as associates or business co-worker. I have many business associates, especially within the writing community. These are the people I would ask for advice about writing, promoting, and marketing. I do have friends who are business associates as well because just as much as I ask for advice, they give me support for my writing. Then of course, security. Security are the people who are the friends that make things happen. I consider my hairdresser , mechanic, book editor, etc. as the security "friends". I speak to them on a daily but for a purpose. I wouldn't consider my hairdresser a friend but I'm secure enough with her to take care of my hair without any worries. She knows what to do without me saying anything. We keep everything personal outside of that because that's not why I'm there. Same for the mechanic and editor--they take care of something that is very delicate and I'm secure with them and know that they won't mess it up. Now, having said all this-I have a handful of female friends because I don't know how to deal or work with females. Meaning being friends with females tends to feel like a job. Case in point: when you walk into your office, you know who not to tell something personal, who not to bring your man around, who not to smile at, or even to eat lunch with it. She talks too much, she's too flirty, she always has an attitude and she mooches. You get a little further to your desk and you see the one who is trying to take your job and is doing just about everything she can to take it. Walk a little further, you pass the girl who whines and cries all the time and she's had another fight with her man. You finally sit down, look up and catch eyes with the worse of them: the hater. She doesn't like you. At all. She probably doesn't have a reason why and you two could hang out if the third wheel of jealousy didn't try to tag along. We've all met these women. We've all worked with them, seen them at our family reunions, hell-might have been these women once or twice. Why is, though, that these types of chicks are always around? Why is there always that one female who feels like the whole world owes her something? What trips me out the most is that no matter how young or old, females will act like that. I was told that I self hate myself because I don't care of females or having a lot of female friends. That's not self-hatred. That's factual. I can honestly say that I do not remember the last time I talked about a female just because she had something I didn't or just for hating sake. I remember one comment about a female I used to work with. She's 28 or 29 years, has six children, not married but ALWAYS at the club and always drinking and getting into fights with other chicks. Last time I heard anything about her, she was having another child. I said she needs to slow down because keeps walking on a very dangerous line. I've said that to her several times so that wasn't anything new but facts are facts. Why do some women feel like what they doesn't affect anyone else? There are women who don't mind being called a bitch. There's women who would set you straight if the first letter of bitch came out your mouth. Then there's women who call themselves bitches but get mad when men do it. Why call yourself that? Why cut down the next female just because you don't have what she has? If you want, work for it. Don't hate about this and that and you're not doing anything. Why are there women who think that five kids by three different men is okay? Now, don't get me wrong. If I had female friendships like Living Single or Girlfriends where we do argue on occassion but still have geniune support for each other and making same strides in business, I would appreciate and be very grateful for that. But...this isn't TV. I have met too many conniving, jealous, worthless females who have nothing better to do but to knock me and what I'm doing. I hate to tell you, though, I won't be knocked by that. In fact, that only makes things better. Who ever said "You can talk about me because I'm hot topic..." knew exactly what they were talking about.

Okay...done venting.